Realistic Expectations

I got a facial yesterday, the first in about 7 years. Yikes! Let me tell you, they are not as relaxing as they sound.

Don't be fooled, this IS a weapon

But when she wasn't squeezing 7 years of dirt out of the pores in my face, I began to think about my Year's lessons. I realized that each month is not about becoming an expert in each focus. It's about learning; learning about myself and about taking care of myself. It's a year of really getting to know me, the way my body and mind works and the ways in which I can get out of it the most potential. I'm finding out what works for me; not anyone else. And I'm finding out where fear holds me back.

I'd like to make this year, also, about overcoming some of those fears. For example, during my exercise month, I did not utilize the gym pool as I've wanted to since I signed up for a membership there. I did not take any classes or try any of the weights. I was afraid of new situations and interacting with strangers. Now, even thought my exercise month is over, that doesn't mean my focus on exercise stops, which means I still have time to overcome these fears as I learn more about what causes them and grow to know myself better. During my facial, I did not ask the woman the many questions I had going on in my head because I felt uncomfortable, I was in an unknown situation. But I will work on picking up on those feelings of reservation and try to confront them within myself.

I need to make sure my expectations of this year are realistic. I shouldn't expect to be given a modeling contract once I'm finished. I shouldn't expect that I'll be able to compete in the Olympics or that I'll be a makeup artist. I have to remember that this is a year of self discovery and lessons that I'm in charge of teaching myself. I don't have a huge budget or a lot of time to spend on any one subject. I will not master skin care, makeup application, become a yoga instructor, etc, but I will have a little more knowledge under my belt as long as I keep plugging along. I should not get overwhelmed with all that I don't know, or allow my fears to keep me from doing my research.

I'm excited to see what things I'll discover about myself. This year feels like a journey to the top of a mountain, and my only companion is a version of myself that I've never taken the time to know. We are working together to reach the top, experiencing hardships and successes together which creates an amazing bond. We depend on each other, we lean on each other. And excitingly, I really like that person I'm getting to know!

Kinda like this!